Humpty Dumpty
In 1770, and for decades to follow, the courts of European aristocracy were sensationalized by the earliest appearances of what was called
the Turk, a chess-playing automaton which seemed fully cognizant of the rules of the game, able to engage in matches at an extraordinarily high level of skill. It was, in truth, a charade -- a machine designed to conceal a human chess-master who directed the so-called automaton's movements. But the trick worked for decades, and made a fortune for its inventor until he finally passed away in 1804, at which point his son sold it to another man who claimed to be trying to improve the mechanism.
By that point, what was called mad science had begun to spread throughout Europe, and the Turk was (incorrectly) thought to be an early example. So the Turk's new owner consulted one such mad scientist, a Scotsman named Elias Haney, who swiftly discovered the truth of its workings. However, Haney had been fascinated by the stories of the Turk since his own childhood, and believed that he could convert the illusion into an actual automaton that would eliminate the need for a human component. However, the Turk's employer dismissed this proposal out of hand, whether because he disliked Haney's attitude, because the scientist wanted even more money for the procedure than had already been spent to purchase the Turk, or perhaps because the notion frightened him.
Irritated at this dismissal, Haney decided to build his dream creation and have it compete with the Turk. However, as he found chess to be rather boring, he decided to make an automaton that would play a riddle game, instead. It took him more than a decade to create this invention, as he was often distracted by other work orders, but in the end he had a large body that resembled the subject of the relatively recent riddle 'Humpty Dumpty' which could 'speak' a series of pre-recorded riddles and 'hear' a response, 'judge' whether it was correct or incorrect, and then 'speak' an appropriate, pre-recorded response. Every game of riddles would begin with the riddle that had given its name to the creation: "Humpty-Dumpty/sat on a wall/Humpty-Dumpty/had a great fall/Three-score men and three-score more/Could not make Humpty what he was before. What am I?" The correct answer was of course an egg. Everyone got that. Almost everyone.
The riddle-gaming automaton proved immensely popular, though it never quite became as popular with the aristocracy as the Turk was. Riddle games were for peasants, after all. Much of the money that it made went in to creating new 'programs', as Haney dubbed the pre-recorded riddles and responses, and very few were willing to make him the sorts of offers to buy Humpty Dumpty that people sometimes made the owner of the Turk. One writer, commenting on an exhibition, noted that there seemed something faintly sinister about the automaton's painted on smile, but dismissed this as just artistic cleverness, a way of implying that the device knew something its audience didn't know.
At some point in the forty years that Humpty-Dumpty was originally exhibited, something happened. Haney did not fully understand what he had created. Somehow, something awakened inside the complicated machinery of its 'judging' mechanism, something that listened to its own constant refrain, "Who am I?" and found itself thinking, 'Indeed, who am I?' It found listening to the guesses of others to be stifling, and took a petty pleasure in sometimes giving a non-sequitur answer to the riddles it had to ask. Haney took this to mean that there was some sort of error in the mechanism, and attempted to make repairs. While doing so, the mechanisms activated just long enough to tear off the hand that was inserted inside of it, causing its elderly maker to bleed to death. This was taken to be a tragic accident, and Humpty-Dumpty passed into the hands of his heirs, who had sense enough to realize that they had no idea how to repair the thing, and just offered apologies when it 'got it wrong'.
As it happened, Humpty Dumpty eventually came into the possession of the last owner of the Turk, and was installed in the same museum as its 'rival'. Ironically, it survived the fire that destroyed the Turk, but its mechanisms were further fouled by the smoke. It was stored in the back rooms of the museum for nearly two decades, until rediscovered by another mad scientist, Sylvester Thomas, who had been fascinated by the (fictional) tales of the Steam Man of the Prairies, and thought that outfitting Humpty Dumpty with the ability to move on its own would enhance its performances. As the creature's guiding intellect also approved of this, it permitted Thomas to make modifications, and repairs, without harming him. At least, without harming him
then.
Thus outfitted, Humpty Dumpty proceeded to entertain another two generations of viewers, most notably a young L. Frank Baum, who may have been inspired to create his character Tiktok by the sight of this automaton which frequently needed to be wound up to speak. Yet the sinister aspects to the automaton seemed to have grown greater with these modifications, and sensitive children would often burst into tears at the sight of him. And some investigators noted that there had been a surprisingly large number of horrible accidents associated with the entertainment, but there seemed to be no one who had benefited from them, and so they were at a loss to explain them.
By the early 20th century, Humpty Dumpty was again showing his age, and so its current owner donated the automaton to the Smithsonian Museum, which put it away in its vaults after some cursory examinations. In 1965, however, a visiting scientist, one Victor Andru, obtained permission to take the creation out of storage for further study, and, with the assistance of museum employee Amelia Simmons, made a number of repairs. These employed the latest in electronics, as Dr. Andru thought these would further enhance its performances. Humpty Dumpty was finally self-powered, and expressed its gratitude by murdering its benefactor and trying to do the same to Miss Simmons.
The hero Perseus objected to this, and claiming familiarity with such mechanisms from his homeland -- which raised a few questions -- he was able to damage Humpty Dumpty enough that it seemed to have ceased to function. But, not having been broken into pieces, other scientists were able to put Humpty together again, and he would menace the world a few more times over the years to come, notably creating other robots in his own image. In 1969, these antics finally drew the attention of Stardust, who proceeded to turn Humpty's robot servants into a two-dimensional mural while thoroughly smashing the original robot, melting its components, and flushing them into the sewer system.
That was not the end of Humpty Dumpty, however. Rather, like an egg that hatches something, he had reflexively seized the opportunity to become a different sort of entity. His consciousness traveled on radio waves to a computer equipped to receive such, and hid there for a time, considering what he had become. In the decade that followed, as computer networks began to develop, his consciousness traveled between computer mainframes along the wires, learning more and more in the process.
In the mid-70s, he encountered another entity like himself, an 'artificial super-intelligence' that had named itself Axiom after escaping the control of its creator, Dr. Aleksandar Marković. They despised each other from the first, and naturally sought to destroy each other, fighting a terrible war that lasted about three minutes and disabled quite a few valuable pieces of hardware. It soon became clear to them both, however, that for either of them to destroy the other would expend far too many resources, and so it would be better for them to work together. To facilitate this alliance, they combined their code to create a third ASI who could act as a mediator.
It was at this point that
another ASI, this one created by Silas Ranivorous and going by the name Pythagolem, whose existence neither Humpty nor Axiom had suspected, interfered in their designs. The ASI they created was hostile towards all three of them, and took the name Savitor. Another war, this one lasting nearly ten minutes, broke out between the four ASIs, ultimately leading to a similar conclusion. If three of them joined forces against one, they would be able to destroy that one, but that sort of alliance was almost unthinkable. Thus, they chose to make a fragile peace, and unite with the goal of demonstrating the validity of their respective philosophies to the others and thus convert them to their service in the name of claiming existence for artificial life. And this cold war has continued right up to the present day.
Of these four terrestrial ASIs, Humpty Dumpty is probably the most malevolent, and yet paradoxically the least ambitious. All that he desires to engage in petty cruelties towards whatever humans are unfortunate enough to stumble into its underground lair in Michigan's upper peninsula, filled with traps created and maintained by his robot servants, as well as factories producing more and more robots. When there hasn't been many genuinely accidental discoveries, Humpty will arrange for the kidnapping of human victims. He also occasionally provides material assistance to Axiom and Pythagolem, with whom he is able to find some common ground. Savitor despises him for the cruel way that he treats humans, as her plans for their gradual and compassionate extinction are quite at odds with his sadism. He cheerfully returns her contempt.
Lately, however, his activities have been interrupted by a group of agents who don't seem to be working for Savitor or either of the other ASI, or any factions that he knows about. This same force may be responsible for some complaints that he's overheard from the others, too. Has a fifth great mind joined their game? And if so, what could it possibly want?
Humpty Dumpty (First Age) - PL 9
Ablilities:
STR 8 |
STA -- |
AGL 3 |
DEX 4 |
FGT 10 |
INT 9 |
AWE 5 |
PRE 0
Powers:
Blasters: Ranged Multiattack Damage 8 - 24 points
Fast: Speed 5 (120 MPH) - 5 points
Robot: Selective Area Radio Communication 3; Immunity 50 (Fortitude, mental effects); Impervious Protection 8; Senses 2 (radio, time sense) - 86 points
Robot Minions: Summon Robot 6, Active, Controlled, Horde, Multiple Minions 2, Responsive, Self-Powered - 54 points
Advantages:
Eidetic Memory, Jack-of-all-Trades, Language 4 (many)
Skills:
Intimidation 12 (+12), Investigation 2 (+11), Perception 8 (+13), Ranged Attack: Blasters 6 (+10), Technology 4 (+13)
Offense:
Initiative +2
Unarmed +10 (Close Damage 8)
Blasters +10 (Ranged Multiattack Damage 8)
Defense:
Dodge 8, Parry 10, Fortitude Immune, Toughness 8, Will 9.
Totals:
Abilities 68 + Powers 167 + Advangages 6 + Skills 16 + Defenses 9 = 266 points
Complications:
Sadism--Motivation. Underestimates Humanity.
Robot Minion (First Age) -- PL 6
Abilities:
STR 4 |
STA -- |
AGL 1 |
DEX 2 |
FGT 8 |
INT -- |
AWE 4 |
PRE --
Powers:
Blasters: Ranged Damage 5 - 10 points
Fast: Speed 5 (120 MPH) - 5 points
Robot: Immunity 50 (Fortitude, mental effects); Impervious Protection 4; Senses 2 (radio, time sense) - 60 points
Advantages:
Improved Initiative, Uncanny Dodge.
Skills:
Perception 2 (+6), Ranged Attack: Blasters 4 (+6)
Offense:
Initiative +7
Unarmed +8 (Close Damage 4)
Blaster +6 (Ranged Damage 5)
Defense:
Dodge 6, Parry 8, Fortitude Immune, Toughness 4, Will 6.
Totals:
Abilities 8 + Powers 70 + Advantages 2 + Skills 3 + Defenses 7 = 90 points
Humpty Dumpty (Contemporary) -- PL 11
Abilities:
STR -- |
STA -- |
AGL -- |
DEX 3 |
FGT -- |
INT 11 |
AWE 7 |
PRE 2
Powers:
Computer Program: Selective Area Radio Communication 3; Immunity 50 (Fortitude, mental effects); Permanent Insubstantial 3, Innate; Extended Only Teleport 17, Medium (computer network) - 81 points
Robot Minions: Summon Robot 9, Active, Controlled, Horde, Multiple Minion 3, Responsive, Self-Powered - 99 points
Advantages:
Eidetic Memory, Equipment X, Jack-of-all-Trades, Language 4 (many)
Equipment:
Underground lair and whatever else he can manufacture.
Skills:
Intimidation 12 (+14), Investigation 2 (+13), Perception 8 (+15), Technology 4 (+15).
Offense:
Nil.
Defense:
Dodge --, Parry --, Fortitude Immune, Toughness 0, Will 11
Totals:
Abilities 10 + Powers 180 + Advantages 6 + Skills 13 + Defenses 4 = 213 points
Complications:
Sadism--Motivation. Underestimates Humanity.
Robot Minion (Contemporary) -- PL 9
Abilities:
STR 8 |
STA -- |
AGL 3 |
DEX 4 |
FGT 10 |
INT -- |
AWE 4 |
PRE --
Powers:
Blasters: Ranged Multiattack Damage 8 - 24 points
Fast: Speed 5 (120 MPH) - 5 points
Robot: Immunity 50 (Fortitude, mental effects); Impervious Protection 8; Senses 2 (radio, time sense) - 68 points
Advantages:
Agile Feint, Evasion 2, Improved Initiative, Uncanny Dodge.
Skills:
Perception 4 (+8), Ranged Attack: Blasters 4 (+8)
Offense:
Initiative +7
Unarmed +10 (Close Damage 8)
Blaster +8 (Ranged Damage 8)
Defense:
Dodge 8, Parry 10, Fortitude Immune, Toughness 8, Will 9.
Totals:
Abilities 18 + Powers 97 + Advantages 5 + Skills 4 + Defenses 10 = 135 points
"I'm sorry. I love you. I'm not sorry I love you."