Jab’s Builds! (Miss Piggy! The Swedish Chef! Sweetums! Gonzo!)

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Jabroniville
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Kade Kilgore

Post by Jabroniville »

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KADE KILGORE
Created By:
Jason Aaron & Carlos Pacheco
First Appearance: X-Men: Schism #1 (Sept. 2011)
Role: Rich Bastard
Group Affiliations: The Hellfire Club
PL 6 (56)
STRENGTH
-2 STAMINA 0 AGILITY 1
FIGHTING 0 DEXTERITY 4
INTELLIGENCE 7 AWARENESS 3 PRESENCE 2

Skills:
Deception 6 (+8)
Expertise (Business) 8 (+15)
Expertise (Criminal) 4 (+11)
Perception 2 (+5)

Advantages:
Benefit 5 (Wealth), Inventor, Ranged Attack 4

Offense:
Unarmed +0 (-2 Damage, DC 13)
Initiative +1

Defenses:
Dodge +2 (DC 12), Parry +2 (DC 12), Toughness +0, Fortitude +1, Will +6

Complications:
Motivation (Greed & Power)

Total: Abilities: 30 / Skills: 20--10 / Advantages: 10 / Powers: 0 / Defenses: 6 (56)

-Jason Aaron's Wolverine & The X-Men book was a lot of fun, and way more uplifting and positive than many comics seem to be these days. In effect, it was a parody of super-hero comics told straight, with cliches kind of being brought up as if they're in-universe trends that people actually notice. And while it's deliberately-silly at times (too much for some), it never takes you "out" of things so much that you can't take the serious bits seriously- stuff like Idie being manipulated by the new Hellfire Club, characters nearly-dying, and more, are all pretty much classic superhero stuff. And most of the humor is very, VERY dark and self-aware of the genre (Kilgore teaches a class on Villainy that includes Putting Women in Refrigerators), so any natural cynics probably won't be turned off by the humor.

-Kade Kilgore himself debuts early on with a bunch of other homicidal children- they're rich brats who've murdered their own parents and families (one kid mentions selling his several brothers to alien slavers), and have formed a new Hellfire Club. And unlike past Clubs, they're NOT Mutants- they are, in fact, X-hating human beings. And they form an F'd-up school that includes people like Sauron, Dog Logan and SABRETOOTH among the faculty. All of his schemes and antics fall apart however, when the X-Men invade his Rival School (a resurrected Massachusetts Academy) and undo all of his work.

-There's a bunch of other kids with a bit less self-control that Kade has (though impulsive, he's not psychopathic- teammate Wilhelmina Kensington, a cute little blonde girl, is full-blown murderously-insane), but similar stats. Most are great at business, have scads of money, and access to any number of High-Tech Weapons (while I'll leave off here, since I can't remember any of it. Just assume lots of Blasts).
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drkrash
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Re: Jab’s Builds (Shinobi Shaw! Gamesmaster! Kade Kilgore!)

Post by drkrash »

I hate this character a lot. Stupid, annoying, and implausible even by comic book standards.
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catsi563
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Re: Jab’s Builds (Shinobi Shaw! Gamesmaster! Kade Kilgore!)

Post by catsi563 »

yeah its the ridiculous notion that wealth is a superpower that allows you to get away with or do anything you want

Bruces joke on the subject aside everyone knows that Lex is one bad day away from Superman drop kicking him into the nearest prison without even a second thought on his way to get lunch
Dr. Silverback has wryly observed that this is like trying to teach lolcats about Shakespeare

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ehh123
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Re: Pigeon Pete

Post by ehh123 »

Jabroniville wrote: Wed May 05, 2021 12:30 pm Image

PIGEON PETE
Role:
Joke Character

-Pete was a normal pigeon mutated by the Kraang into a humanoid. He was taught to speak by Kirby O'Neil (April's father) and delivered a message to her when he escaped. He later allies with the show's version of the Mighty Mutanimals, now acting as a background character. He is depicted as obsessed with bread and frequently slams into plate-glass windows.
Pete is also a character in the IDW comics and while he is still a joke character mutated from a normal pigeon, his design is different.
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Skavenger
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Re: Jab’s Builds (Shinobi Shaw! Gamesmaster! Kade Kilgore!)

Post by Skavenger »

See, I actually liked Kade Kilgore, because it kind of brought back around the idea that in order for someone to have ideas as crazy as theirs, you had to look at things in a very childish way. Things like the "collapsible suitcase sentinel," the "nanoswarm" sentinel, all that stuff they advertised are things you really have to suspend disbelief in a way that a child does best. While probably not a great long-term group of villains, they did fit their role in that title perfectly as the "we know all the tropes, we don't care" villains.

Plus, I mean, we had absolutely brilliant moments that would never have happened if their group hadn't existed. If there hadn't been a Frankenstein, we would have never had Wolverine punching his claws through pies in order to stab clowns in the face, or Frankenstein throwing an elephant at him.

People I know always get upset when I point out that, at their heart, comic books are child wish-fulfilment stories that have a very basic, childish understanding of how things in the world work ("If I dress up like Dracula and own a sweet car, I can stop all crime.") and there's very few ways of showing that better than having a character be an actual child. It's probably why Marvel's been so loathe to let Peter Parker, Kitty Pryde, Johnny Storm, and other "probably getting into their 40s now if we're being realistic" characters grow up completely.
Jabroniville
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Manuel Enduque

Post by Jabroniville »

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MANUEL ENDUQUE
Created By:
Jason Aaron & Frank Cho
First Appearance: X-Men- Schism #2 (July 2011)
Role: Child Slaver
Group Affiliations: The Hellfire Club

-Enduque is Kade Kilgore's most-reliable aide in his new juvenile Hellfire Club- he's stated to be a vicious kid from a family of slavers based in Africa- they moved on to interstellar trading of life. He was calmer and less psychotic than the rest of the Club kids, but still killed his own father and had his brothers imprisoned on a world of man-eating aliens in order to secure his inheritance. He was a calm, collected weaponsmith, acting as the group's Tech Guy.
Jabroniville
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Wilhelmina Kensington

Post by Jabroniville »

Image
Image

WILHELMINA KENSINGTON
Created By:
Jason Aaron & Frank Cho
First Appearance: X-Men- Schism #2 (July 2011)
Role: Tiny Psychopath
Group Affiliations: The Hellfire Club

-Wilhelmina was another part of the Power Trio of Hellfire Club kids- while Kade was the leader and Manuel was calm, this little girl in flowery outfits was FRIGGIN' MENTAL- a complete violent, addle-brained psychopath who played perfectly with Jason Aaron's weird sense of humor on Wolverine & The X-Men. With a love of beauty pageants & martial arts, she inherited her mother's hotel business after the lady mysteriously fell from a great height, and was the most homicidal of Kade's crew- her innocent appearance an obvious deliberate contrast to how much of a nutjob she was.
Sidney369
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Re: Jab’s Builds (Shinobi Shaw! Gamesmaster! Kade Kilgore!)

Post by Sidney369 »

Kade Kilgore is the smartest guy in the Marvel Universe, as he started a school just so he could get Mystique to dress in a sexy teacher uniform.
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Jabroniville
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Re: Pigeon Pete

Post by Jabroniville »

ehh123 wrote: Mon Jun 07, 2021 7:52 pm
Jabroniville wrote: Wed May 05, 2021 12:30 pm Image

PIGEON PETE
Role:
Joke Character

-Pete was a normal pigeon mutated by the Kraang into a humanoid. He was taught to speak by Kirby O'Neil (April's father) and delivered a message to her when he escaped. He later allies with the show's version of the Mighty Mutanimals, now acting as a background character. He is depicted as obsessed with bread and frequently slams into plate-glass windows.
Pete is also a character in the IDW comics and while he is still a joke character mutated from a normal pigeon, his design is different.
Oh yeah- the IDW books seem to use EVERYBODY. It's kind of neat how they're not just reliant on the '80s stuff, but focus on the newer two shows to fill out the cast as well. Their own Mutanimals, also using Slash, features all sorts of random guys.
Jabroniville
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Joined: Fri Nov 04, 2016 8:05 pm

Kid Blackheart

Post by Jabroniville »

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Image
Image

KID BLACKHEART (Anton Satan)
Created By:
Jason Aaron & Roland Boschi
First Appearance: Ghost Rider- Heaven's On Fire #1 (Aug. 2009)
Role: Child Satanist
Group Affiliations: The Hellfire Club

-Anton Satan (he insists it's pronounced in the Czech manner- "Shu-tan", like NHL player Miroslav Satan) was born as part of Project Blackheart- a breeding program by a church of Satanists using the worst human beings- murderers, rapists, cannibals, and CEOs (haha, okay, that's pretty funny) for the purpose of creating the Anti-Christ. The Angel Zadkiel ascended to the throne of Heaven and tried to kill Anton to prevent Armageddon, but he escaped and became a Wall Street executive- all his supervisors began committing suicide. He was hunted by Zadkiel's agents and saved by Johnny Blaze & Danny Ketch, who forced him to lead them to the gates of Hell. He reveals his master plan: to invade Heaven with an army of demons summoned from Master Pandemonium. They fail, but both villains escape. He later pops up at a video-conference Hellfire Club meeting where Kate Kilgore presides- his final appearance (also by Jason Aaron).
Jabroniville
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Joined: Fri Nov 04, 2016 8:05 pm

Xanto Starblood

Post by Jabroniville »

Image
Image

XANTO STARBLOOD
Created By:
Jason Aaron & Chris Bachalo
First Appearance: Wolverine & The X-Men #5 (April 2012)
Role: Evil Doctor
Group Affiliations: The Massachusetts Academy
PL 9 (140), PL 10 (140) to Animals
STRENGTH
9 STAMINA 8 AGILITY 2
FIGHTING 9 DEXTERITY 2
INTELLIGENCE 6 AWARENESS 2 PRESENCE 2

Skills:
Expertise (Xenobiology) 8 (+14)
Intimidation 6 (+8)
Investigation 3 (+5)
Perception 3 (+5)
Stealth 2 (+4)
Technology 6 (+12)

Advantages:
Equipment 6 (Space Gear), Ranged Attack 6, Ultimate Xenobiology Skill

Powers:
"Alien Physiology"
Immunity 10 (Life Support) [10]

Mind Control 10 (Flaws: Touch Range -2, Limited to Animals) (10) -- [11]
  • AE: "Shocking Touch" Damage 9 (9)
Offense:
Unarmed +9 (+9 Damage, DC 24)
Shocking Touch +9 (+9 Damage, DC 24)
Mind Control +9 (+10 Affliction, DC 20)
Laser Beams +8 (+6 Ranged Damage, DC 21)
Initiative +2

Defenses:
Dodge +10 (DC 20), Parry +9 (DC 19), Toughness +8, Fortitude +8, Will +6

Complications:
Prejudice (Mutant)

Total: Abilities: 80 / Skills: 28--14 / Advantages: 13 / Powers: 21 / Defenses: 12 (140)

-Xanto Starblood is an evil alien "Extreme Zoologist" out to exterminate Broo, a student of the Jean Grey School, because the idea of a "good Brood" offends his concept of the order of the universe. He has Kitty Pryde impregnated with Brood Babies as a distraction and invades the School, but Broo escapes. Kitty sics numerous Bamfs on him, then lures him onto the lawn, where their tame Krakoa violently-pummels him. In one final spree, he attempts to kill Kitty, but Broo violently-defends his guardian, tearing into Xanto with an unusual ferocity for the so-far-peaceful young Brood. Xanto is taken away by S.W.O.R.D., but is eventually sprung by Kade Kilgore's Hellfire Club, at which point he starts teaching at their Rival School.

-Xanto is strong and dangerous, but can be beaten by a sufficiently-enraged young Brood. He's smart, and good with xenobiology (his most-quoted works are The Mating Habits of the Dire Wraiths and The Interplanetary Guide to Evolutionary Biology), but mainly had New Villain Stink making him seem so bad-ass at first.
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Davies
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Re: Kid Blackheart

Post by Davies »

Jabroniville wrote: Tue Jun 08, 2021 6:48 amHe was hunted by Zadkiel's agents and saved by Johnny Blaze & Danny Ketch, who forced him to lead them to the gates of Hell. He reveals his master plan: to invade Heaven with an army of demons summoned from Master Pandemonium.
Me: That's your plan, really?
Anton: Yes, and there's nothing you can do to stop --
Me: Go ahead.
Anton: -- me ... what?
Me: Well, here's the thing. You want to take an army of demons to invade heaven -- a fight on the angels' home turf, that they've been preparing to defend from just that sort of invasion for about, ooh, I dunno, a billion years or so? Maybe more? Anyway, I'd say the odds favor the defenders in this case, especially since some kid who's read Sun Tzu a few times and has no practical experience is going to be the general of the attacking force. I'm assuming you've read Sun Tzu, it's the sort of thing on the reading list of most Wall Street wannabes.
Anton: <starts to interrupt>
Me: But regardless, since every demon dragged into your cute little blitzkrieg is one who isn't tempting or tormenting a human being, I'm a little shaky on why you think I'd try and stop you. So have fun storming the walls of Paradise, assuming you even get that far, Satan.
Anton: That's Shuh-tan! Shuh-tan!
Me: Shuuuuuuh it is. <saunters off whistling>

"Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand." (Correctly pronounced) Satan, as quoted by Mark Twain.
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Skavenger
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Re: Kid Blackheart

Post by Skavenger »

Jabroniville wrote: Tue Jun 08, 2021 6:48 am Image
Welp, her spine is broken. Either that or something is terribly wrong with her legs just to get a cleavage shot.
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Ares
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Re: Jab’s Builds (Shinobi Shaw! Gamesmaster! Kade Kilgore!)

Post by Ares »

Skavenger wrote: Mon Jun 07, 2021 11:08 pm See, I actually liked Kade Kilgore, because it kind of brought back around the idea that in order for someone to have ideas as crazy as theirs, you had to look at things in a very childish way. Things like the "collapsible suitcase sentinel," the "nanoswarm" sentinel, all that stuff they advertised are things you really have to suspend disbelief in a way that a child does best. While probably not a great long-term group of villains, they did fit their role in that title perfectly as the "we know all the tropes, we don't care" villains.
There is a difference tho. Suspension of disbelief works best when it's just rationalizing some of the more fantastical elements of a setting away with the understanding that physics work a bit different in that world, or magic is real, or the science is more advanced, etc. Stuff like Tony Stark having a suitcase that turns into a suit of power armor doesn't break immersion because you just accept "Okay, in this setting, the science allows it".

Things like this, Doomsday Clock, Final Crisis and Gwenpool completely break my immersion because they bring in all of this meta-stuff that just kind of slaps you in the face with "This is a story, look how clever I'm being, I know all the tropes". Even if superheroes are essentially modern mythology viewed through a lens of childlike wonder and optimism, they're still stories and stories work better when they draw you in, not when they remind you they're stories.

I mean, it's not to say that it's impossible to do it right, Princess Bride is my favorite movie of all time after all and it's literally a grandfather reading his grandson a story. But there at least both the grandson and the grandfather are characters as well and there's no winking at the camera. Though Deadpool does get away with it too in his movies, but then I don't really view Deadpool as being part of any existing universe, and is more of a stand alone franchise doing its own thing.

Then again, maybe I'm just incredibly biased. I certainly accept that as a possibility. :D
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Ares
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Re: Jab’s Builds (Shinobi Shaw! Gamesmaster! Kade Kilgore!)

Post by Ares »

drkrash wrote: Mon Jun 07, 2021 5:35 pm I hate this character a lot. Stupid, annoying, and implausible even by comic book standards.
Yeah, I'm wondering if Jason Aaron was always terrible and I just wasn't paying close enough attention before.
"My heart is as light as a child's, a feeling I'd nearly forgotten. And by helping those in need, I will be able to keep that feeling alive."
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