Jab’s Builds! (Miss Piggy! The Swedish Chef! Sweetums! Gonzo!)

Where in all of your character write ups will go.
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Ken
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Re: Jab's Builds! (Skrull Kill Krew! Skrull X! Spitfire! Spirits of Vengeance!)

Post by Ken »

Doctor Malsyn wrote:I'm curious, is the ability to make "Sexy Comicbook Poses" stretching or a feature?
Wasp Waist: Feature 1 (_________ can survive despite her waist being narrower than her thigh and there being no room for any internal organs there)
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Re: Jab's Builds! (Skrull Kill Krew! Skrull X! Spitfire! Spirits of Vengeance!)

Post by Jabroniville »

Doctor Malsyn wrote:I'm curious, is the ability to make "Sexy Comicbook Poses" stretching or a feature?
In a comic book world, it's as natural as pooping or peeing is to us, so I usually leave it out of the builds. I mean, I'd have to include it EVERY TIME I added a female character :).
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Sise-Neg

Post by Jabroniville »

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SISE-NEG:
Created By: Steve Englehart, Neal Adams & Frank Brunner
First Appearance: Marvel Premiere #13 (Jan. 1974)

-Among Steve Englehart's more bizarre tales for Marvel was the story of Sise-Neg ("Genesis" spelled backwards), a mystical sorcerer from the 31st Century who becomes omnipotent by traveling back in time and gathering magical energy in the process, eventually drinking in all the magical energy in the universe during the Big Bang. Originally intending to recreate the universe in his own image, he realized upon gathering the power that this was an empty journey, and that "reality is harmony as it should be"- he thus recreated the universe exactly as it once was.

-This story proved controversial, as Sise-Neg was pretty clearly meant to be God Himself- Englehart denied it to Marvel Editorial, and in the letters column when readers complained. Then of course he went back and was like "yeah, of course that's who it was". Because he's a pain in the ass that way. While I empthasize with anyone attempting to rein in this artistic weirdo, I gotta admire his chutzpah :).
Last edited by Jabroniville on Thu Jan 27, 2022 1:43 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Jab's Builds! (Skrull Kill Krew! Skrull X! Spitfire! Spirits of Vengeance!)

Post by FuzzyBoots »

Ken wrote:
Doctor Malsyn wrote:I'm curious, is the ability to make "Sexy Comicbook Poses" stretching or a feature?
Wasp Waist: Feature 1 (_________ can survive despite her waist being narrower than her thigh and there being no room for any internal organs there)
Tsk tsk... making fun of someone who suffers from Green's disease!

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Re: Jab's Builds! (Skrull Kill Krew! Skrull X! Spitfire! Spirits of Vengeance!)

Post by Ares »

Jabroniville wrote: One thing I always found absurd was Garth Ennis's claim that "Superheroes In WWII" was disrespectful to the real soldiers who fought & died there. I was like "... you mean those same soldiers that LOVED reading about Superman flying in and buggering Hitler's army?" What a douche.
Garth Ennis complaining about anything being disrespectful , given the kind of stories he's built his career on, is somewhere between hypocritical and "you are such a hypocritically dumb fuck, Garth".
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Squirrel Girl

Post by Jabroniville »

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SQUIRREL GIRL (Doreen Green)
Created By:
Will Murray & Steve Ditko
First Appearance: Marvel Super-Heroes #8 (Jan. 1992)
Role: Memetastic Heroine
Group Affiliation: Great Lakes Avengers, The New Avengers
PL 11 (205)
STRENGTH
2 STAMINA 3 AGILITY 5
FIGHTING 8 DEXTERITY 2
INTELLIGENCE 0 AWARENESS 0 PRESENCE 1

Skills:
Acrobatics 2 (+5)
Deception 3 (+4)
Technology 2 (+2)
Expertise (Animal Handling) 14 (+15) -- Flaws: Limited to Rodents
Perception 4 (+4)
Vehicles 7 (+9)
Insight 3 (+3)
Stealth 4 (+7)

Advantages: 
Animal Empathy, Defensive Roll 3, Defensive Attack, Equipment 3 (Squirrely-Gig Helicopter), Improved Defense, Luck 8, Minion 2 (Monkey Joe or Tippy-Toe), Power Attack, Set-Up, Teamwork 2, Ultimate Handle Animal

Powers:
"Mutant Powers: Squirrel-Themed Physiology"
Leaping 2 (30 feet) [2]
"Sharp Claws & Rodent Teeth" Strength-Damage +1 [1]
Movement 2 (Wall-Crawling 2) [4]
"Tail" Extra Limb 1 [1]
Senses 2 (Low-Light Vision, Acute Scent) [2]
Comprehend 2 (Speak to & Understand Animals) (Flaws: Limited to Squirrels -2) [1]

"Force Attacks To Miss" Enhanced Dodge 8 & Parry 8 (Extras: Area- 30ft. Burst, Affects Others) (Flaws: Extras Limited to Squirrels) [32]
"Screw Up Others" Affliction 11 (Fort; Impaired/Disabled/Transformed to Incompetence) (Extras: Perception Ranged +2, Cumulative) [44]

"Benefit Squirrels/Make Others Suck More"
Enhanced Close Combat 8 (Extras: Area- 30ft. Burst, Affects Others Only +0) (Flaws: Limited to Squirrels) [8]
Luck Control 2 (Spend & Bestow HP on Others) (Extras: Area- 30ft. Burst) (Flaws: Limited to Squirrels) [6]
Luck Control 2 (Negate HPs/Fiats & Force Re-Rolls) [6]

Offense:
Unarmed +8 (+2 Damage, DC 17)
Teeth & Claws +8 (+3 Damage, DC 18)
Screw Up Others -- (+11 Perception-Ranged Affliction, DC 21)
Initiative +5

Defenses:
Dodge +10 (DC 20), Parry +10 (DC 20), Toughness +3 (+6 D.Roll), Fortitude +5, Will +7

Complications:
Responsibility (The Great Lakes Team)
Responsibility (Squirrels)
Reputation (Most Powerful Super-Hero of All-Time)

Total: Abilities: 42 / Skills: 32--16 / Advantages: 24 / Powers: 107 / Defenses: 16 (205)

MONKEY JOE/TIPPY-TOE
Role:
Animal Minion
PL 0 (28)
STRENGTH
-5 STAMINA -4 AGILITY -2
FIGHTING -2 DEXTERITY 0
INTELLIGENCE 0 AWARENESS 1 PRESENCE -3

Skills:
Athletics 12 (+7)
Close Combat (Bite) 2 (+4)
Expertise (Survival) 4 (+5)
Perception 4 (+5)
Technology 4 (+4)

Advantages:
Close Attack 5

Powers:
"Animal Senses" Senses 3 (Acute & Extended Scent, Low-Light Vision) [3]
"Natural Weapons- Teeth" Strength-Damage +2 [2]

"Small Size" Shrinking 12 (Feats: Innate) (Extras: Permanent +0) [25]
(-3 Strength, -1 Speed, +6 Defenses, +12 Stealth, -6 Intimidation)

Offense:
Unarmed +3 (-5 Damage, DC 5)
Bite +5 (-3 Damage, DC 7)
Initiative -2

Defenses:
Dodge +4 (DC 14), Parry +4 (DC 14), Toughness -4, Fortitude +0, Will +0

Complications: 
Weakness (Small Size)- At their natural size, Squirrels are vulnerable to large creatures- even without good accuracy. Anything of Size Rank -2 or more (human size and up) using a melee attack on a Squirrel effectively strike with Burst Area Damage at their strength rank naturally.
Disabled (Animal)- Squirrels cannot speak to human beings, though they can manipulate things with their paws sort of like humans can with their hands.

Total: Abilities: -24 / Skills: 26--13 / Advantages: 5 / Powers: 30 / Defenses: 4 (28)

-How do you define Squirrel Girl? Basically being Steve Ditko's last worthwhile creation in comics before he went into hiding AGAIN, she was a one-note joke character introduced in a goofy strip where she helped Iron Man defeat DOCTOR DOOM by using an army of Squirrels. After this 1992 debut, she vanished for an eternity, basically being a trivia answer more than anything. Then Dan Slott re-used her for his Great Lakes Avengers series, and she ended up picking up even MORE insane victories over huge threats, from the minor (M.O.D.O.K.) to the major (Thanos, with The Watcher on hand to declare this the real one and not some clone or something- though Thanos later bragged that his clones can fool even The Watcher, because writers can be butthurt fanboys sometimes, too). Some writers (and fans) lose their feces over things like this, as it "devalues" their favourites or something (me, I grew out of the "my favourite has to always win" mentality years ago- part of why my Builds are so under-powered compared to some, I guess), but nitpicking over something as obviously silly as SQUIRREL GIRL just seems bizarre to me.

-Squirrel Girl was still mainly a one-off Joke Character for a while, popping up only in random books, but in 2014, Marvel actually decided to start a really big PUSH behind her, giving her an ongoing series by a pair of Comedy Comic Book Creators, but it was rebooted by the next year, never having been really successful (the art receieved a LOT of complaints, going from "deliberately cartoony" to being quite grotesque and hideous). Sales were generally about a third of what stuff like Thunderbolts or Guardians of the Galaxy get (around 13-15,000 a month), never mind the top sellers of the industry... but slightly better than, say, Drax or Pasty Walker, Hellcat. She also appears in the Hellcat book, and as the least-important (by FAR) member of the Sunspot-led Avengers Idea Mechanics Avengers book. 

-Of course, I'm not that huge a fan anyways. Characters like the Great Lakes Avengers & Squirrel Girl are funny for about a panel or two, and I can't imagine them lasting much longer in my mind. There's some good gags about the nature of comics, and the interpersonal stuff (like Deadpool's Chubby Chaser fetish over Bertha) is OK, but it's altogether not really my thing to read a "happy, wacky" comic book. I like the word gags or occasional jokes in stuff like Secret Six better. Or characters that are funny because they ACCIDENTALLY suck (Barrage of the Dark Riders... I love his "No Hands Having" ass).

-Squirrel Girl's a basic weaker build, with PL 8 defensiveness because she's hard to hit, but only PL 6 in melee, with a bunch of virtually useless powers (Comprehend Squirrels- not even Animal Control!). But there's some big things about her... Luck 8, something most GMs would probably not want you to have, but you don't beat Thanos without whipping that sucker out there. Joke Characters are kind of hard to stat when they prove occasionally effective, but that goes a long ways. Then there's Luck Control... 2 ranks to screw others up, and 2 ranks to bestow HPs upon Squirrels. THEN there's 11 ranks of Afflicting Others With Suckiness (Perception-Ranged of course), and the ability to make Squirrels into elite fighters (Tippy-Toe & Monkey Joe would become PL 4 Close Combat fighters. Squirrel Girl is a PL-breaking Beast of a build that cannot be stopped. Be afraid.
Last edited by Jabroniville on Thu Jan 27, 2022 1:43 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: Jab's Builds! (Skrull X! Spitfire! Spirits of Vengeance! Squirrel Girl!)

Post by Doctor Malsyn »

Never quite understood the obsession with her. She's cute though, I'll give her that.
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Re: Jab's Builds! (Skrull Kill Krew! Skrull X! Spitfire! Spirits of Vengeance!)

Post by Jabroniville »

FuzzyBoots wrote:
Ken wrote:
Doctor Malsyn wrote:I'm curious, is the ability to make "Sexy Comicbook Poses" stretching or a feature?
Wasp Waist: Feature 1 (_________ can survive despite her waist being narrower than her thigh and there being no room for any internal organs there)
Tsk tsk... making fun of someone who suffers from Green's disease!

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God that comic is awesome. Milholland's a cool dude, too- I met him at the Calgary Comic Expo. Though the dumbass STILL doesn't have his strip collected in book form, so he makes no money at all when he travels far from home, and probably won't ever come back to Canada.
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Re: Jab's Builds! (Skrull X! Spitfire! Spirits of Vengeance! Squirrel Girl!)

Post by danelsan »

I'd be sort of okay with the likes of Deadpool, Gweenpool or Squirrel Girl in their own little worlds, but I can't stand when they interact with the rest of the Marvel Universe, though. Also, severe meme saturation doesn't help me like them either.

Same goes for the Nextwave crew. It is more or less okay in their own book, but if that characterization and the things that happen there spills out in the larger MU, it sucks as far as I'm concerned. Also, much like gag characters such as Squirrel Girl, an overly wacky series like Nextwave would get pretty tiring, even boring, if it was an ongoing.
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Re: Jab's Builds! (Skrull X! Spitfire! Spirits of Vengeance! Squirrel Girl!)

Post by drkrash »

Deadpool is not a fave of mine, but I actually find him a tolerable kind of zany in Uncanny Avengers.

I liked Squirrel Girl when she was treated as a somewhat normal person in Bendis' Avengers about 10 years ago.

In general, I hate comedy comic books and I don't think the character is worthy of the push she's getting.
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Re: Jab's Builds! (Skrull Kill Krew! Skrull X! Spitfire! Spirits of Vengeance!)

Post by Batgirl III »

Doctor Malsyn wrote:I'm curious, is the ability to make "Sexy Comicbook Poses" stretching or a feature?
It's not actually covered by the M&M rules. You need Call of Cthulhu's SAN Check system for handling the body horror.
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Re: Jab's Builds! (Skrull Kill Krew! Skrull X! Spitfire! Spirits of Vengeance!)

Post by greycrusader »

Ares wrote:
Jabroniville wrote: One thing I always found absurd was Garth Ennis's claim that "Superheroes In WWII" was disrespectful to the real soldiers who fought & died there. I was like "... you mean those same soldiers that LOVED reading about Superman flying in and buggering Hitler's army?" What a douche.
Garth Ennis complaining about anything being disrespectful , given the kind of stories he's built his career on, is somewhere between hypocritical and "you are such a hypocritically dumb fuck, Garth".
I wonder if anyone ever pointed out to Garth Ennis (and those of similar opinions, mostly British authors) that Jack Kirby and Joe Simon, co-creators of CAPTAIN AMERICA, actually served in combat during WWII, among many other Golden Age writers and artists? I imagine not a few English comics creators of the period also saw action (and yes, there were Brit-comics in the era).

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Re: Jab's Builds! (Skrull X! Spitfire! Spirits of Vengeance! Squirrel Girl!)

Post by Thorpocalypse »

danelsan wrote:I'd be sort of okay with the likes of Deadpool, Gweenpool or Squirrel Girl in their own little worlds, but I can't stand when they interact with the rest of the Marvel Universe, though. Also, severe meme saturation doesn't help me like them either.
Doctor Malsyn wrote:Never quite understood the obsession with her. She's cute though, I'll give her that.
drkrash wrote:I liked Squirrel Girl when she was treated as a somewhat normal person in Bendis' Avengers about 10 years ago.

In general, I hate comedy comic books and I don't think the character is worthy of the push she's getting.
BLASPHEMERS!!!!!! THE LOT OF YOU, BLASPHEMERS!!!!!

How dare you speak ill of the greatest superhero the world has ever known?!?!?! Defeater of Doom! Defeater of Thanos! Possessor of the greatest (partially ripped off...well, mostly ripped off) theme song of all time?!?!?

MAY YOU ALL BE FORCED TO READ HANK PYM COMICS IN YOUR DREAMS FOR THE NEXT WEEK!!!
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Re: Jab's Builds! (Skrull X! Spitfire! Spirits of Vengeance! Squirrel Girl!)

Post by Doctor Malsyn »

Thorpocalypse wrote:
BLASPHEMERS!!!!!! THE LOT OF YOU, BLASPHEMERS!!!!!

How dare you speak ill of the greatest superhero the world has ever known?!?!?! Defeater of Doom! Defeater of Thanos! Possessor of the greatest (partially ripped off...well, mostly ripped off) theme song of all time?!?!?

MAY YOU ALL BE FORCED TO READ HANK PYM COMICS IN YOUR DREAMS FOR THE NEXT WEEK!!!
Yep, not a clue why that'd be a detriment, and not just because I'm only vaguely aware of who hank pym is.
(Ant man, right?)

And apologies, but I can't bring myself to listening to that video man. I'm sure it's done well enough though.
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Re: Jab's Builds! (Skrull X! Spitfire! Spirits of Vengeance! Squirrel Girl!)

Post by jcjec »

Thorpocalypse wrote:MAY YOU ALL BE FORCED TO READ HANK PYM COMICS IN YOUR DREAMS FOR THE NEXT WEEK!!!
This wouldn't be a problem for me. Hank has long been one of my favorite characters in comics, especially during his days with the West Coast Avengers when he simply went by Dr. Pym. :)
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