Jab’s Builds! (Lawnmower Man! Samus Aran! Metroids!)

[Ares]

One of the most hilarious parts about Rey was how in Rise of Skywalker she literally says, "People keep saying that they know me. No one does." Which was actually something backed up by the new writers brought in Rise of Skywalker when they had to ask themselves, "So, what do we know about Rey?" and the answer was, "Not much". No one, not even the writers, really knew her because she was basically a combination of maxed out skills, powers and Feats with a personality that could be described as "vaguely nice with parent issues". They were so busy giving her every Force power ever that they forgot to include an actual character arc or personality.

[Shock]

The only time Rey's "everybody loves me" thing really stood out to me was in Rise of Skywalker when Poe is about to be shot by the scoundrel chick. Then Rey winks and smiles and suddenly she's giving them her most prized possession.

[HalloweenJack]

In my own little shared universe (which I constantly add to but never write about) I decided to do a few things with Star Wars.


The EU, while I didn't care for it or read it very much, *DID* happen. But something along the line happened to turn it into the Disney SW universe (which I also don't care for much).

It all started with a third rate biographer of Emperor Palpatine by the name of Snoke. While attempting said biography on the Emperor, Snoke discovered by accident a secret treasure trove of Palpatine's in a very Da Vinci Code roundabout kind of way, finding alot of previously unknown to the public information about the Emperor, the legends of the Sith Eternal, and so forth.

He also found a very interesting curiosity: a stone or gem that Palpatine had uncovered years before, but was verrrrrrry nervous about ever using because he could sense the absolute power coming it. Power to alter reality at a whim. Snoke, who was sort of a Palps fanboy, decided that with such a weapon he could essentially just make things the way they ought to be in his mind.

That was a mistake. Sure, he altered the greater party of the galaxy with it after intense study, wiping away people and intstitutions, creating new ones, restoring Palpatine to life just as he had been before the Death Star exploded, and saving him from it and bring him to Snoke himself, setting himself up as the Supreme Leader of the newly created First Order, etc, but it came with a terrible price. Snoke died, his form terribly twisted, his final words admitting everything he had done to Palpatine.

The Emperor just cackled at this and using his Force abilities was able to mask his presence from the appropriate individuals and setting out to take back what was once his. He even took Snoke's deceased form and had it cloned, giving it most of the original's memories, and keeping more just in case. So Palpatine ruled from the shadows, knowing that he had been reborn due to Snoke's confession, but still having the memories of this new reality as well.

Snoke made another mistake. In misusing the Reality Stone to attempt to twist the very Force itself to his will he had created Palpatine's own downfall. The Emperor's granddaughter had been a creation of the Reality Stone, but it was also an act of balance by the Force upon the stone. This was what Jedi historians had referred to as a 'Mah-Reesoo" (or they would if a certain Force ghost hadn't destroyed a good deal of their lierature), a rare physical manifestation of the Force when acted upon by other powers, such as the Power Cosmic, the Source, etc.

This Mah-Reesoo had the innate workings of the Reality Stone within it and could subconsciously alter the very fabric of reality.

In a situation where you need to be an expert pilot? No problem. Now you are are.

Need to be able to defeat a trained Sith warrior? You can with no problems.

Need people to trust and like you? They do so naturally.

Hell you can even counter the crippling Reality set in motion by Snoke to break and exile the greatest hero of the Rebellion, and pull him back into the fight.

And against all odds and believeability, you arch rival falls in love with you.

[Ares]

I did find it kind of funny in Rise of Skywalker that Rey shows she has the power to heal . . . but when Poe gets shot in the shoulder she just lets him wander around with his arm in a sling instead of healing him. She'll use her powers to heal a giant sand snake and her worst enemy, but not Poe.

Likewise, there's this scene where Rey is using a boat to get to the Death Star remains, and no some repulsor lift boat or speeder, just a boat with a sail . . . and I had to ask ,"How does someone from a desert planet know how to sail? And sail better than the people whose boat she stole?"

[Bladewind]

I hadn't noticed that about the healing - but it's gonna bug me now. I chalked the snake up to her learning the power and knew it was going to "matter" later...

As for sailing... maybe she sailed sand dunes?

[Jabroniville]

BB-8
Role: The New Mascot, Cute Robot
Group Affiliations: The Resistance
PL 3 (71)
STRENGTH -4 STAMINA -- AGILITY +0
FIGHTING 0 DEXTERITY 0
INTELLIGENCE 3 AWARENESS 3 PRESENCE 3

Skills:
Deception 2 (+5)
Expertise (Galactic Politics & Peoples) 2 (+5)
Insight 2 (+5)
Perception 1 (+4)
Technology 7 (+10)

Advantages:
Daze (Deception), Luck, Ranged Attack 5

Powers:
"Protocol Droid"
Protection 1 [1]
Immunity 30 (Fortitude Effects) [30]
"Rolling Surface" Movement 1 (Slithering) [2]

"Quick Calculations" Quickness 4 (Flaws: Limited to Mental Actions & Repairs) [2]
"Datalink" Communication (Technology) 3 [12]

"Gadgets" Variable 1 (Any Technological Descriptor) [7]
(Sample Gadgets: Oil Injector, Cable Gun, Fusion Cutter, Holoprojector, Periscope, Electric Pike, Propeller, Ejector Compartment, Lariat, Air Cannon, Small Saw, Fire Extinguisher, Umbrella, Smoke Screen, Droid Deactivator, Headdress Detangler, Flea Remover, Distracter, Life-Form Scanner, Jukebox, Inflatable Mattress, Storage Drive, Water Pump/Hose, Polarity Sink, Breakdance Mode, Lubricant, Confetti Cannon)

"Tiny Size" Shrinking 8 (Feats: Innate) (Extras: Permanent +0) -- (1 foot) [9]
(-2 Strength, +4 Defenses, +8 Stealth, -4 Intimidation, -1 Speed)

Offense:
Unarmed +0 (-4 Damage, DC 17)
Initiative +0

Defenses:
Dodge +6 (DC 16), Parry +2 (DC 12), Toughness +1, Fortitude --, Will +5

Complications:
Responsibility (The Rebel Alliance)- BB-8 has been assigned with a mission to aid Princess Leia.
Weakness (Magnets, Electrical Attacks)- Droids are made entirely of metal, and are thus vulnerable to certain things.
Prejudice (Droid)- Droids are not allowed in certain areas, treated like property, often have their MEMORIES WIPED, and even tortured in some weird parts of the world.
Disabled (Astromech)- Astromech Droids do not have real limbs, legs nor the ability to speak normally.

Total: Abilities: 4 / Skills: 14--7 / Advantages: 7 / Powers: 63 / Defenses: 8 (71)

-BB-8 is our new "mascot" character in the Sequel Trilogy, being an ultra-cute spherical Droid with a tiny "head' piece on top. He was on all the merch, was focused upon heavily, and became one of the most suscessful "icons" of the new franchise, though hasn't had as much of an effect on the plot.

[Thorpocalypse]

I did find it kind of funny in Rise of Skywalker that Rey shows she has the power to heal . . . but when Poe gets shot in the shoulder she just lets him wander around with his arm in a sling instead of healing him. She'll use her powers to heal a giant sand snake and her worst enemy, but not Poe.

Likewise, there's this scene where Rey is using a boat to get to the Death Star remains, and no some repulsor lift boat or speeder, just a boat with a sail . . . and I had to ask ,"How does someone from a desert planet know how to sail? And sail better than the people whose boat she stole?"

I noticed that, too. Overall, I was entertained by the last trilogy but my Odin, there were some glaring inconsistencies in each movie and I felt like so many of the characters got the shaft development-wise. None more than Rey. She was supposed to be the heart of the series and rarely gave her a chance to actually be that character. Like you said before, they just power geeked her up and didn't give much of any real development.

It felt like a lot of times the SW braintrust was like, "OK, so people loved The MCU...they had Thanos...people loved Thanos...Thanos was throwing moons at people...we need them to love Star Wars again...let's start having Rey throw moons at people! That's the ticket!"

I'm exaggerating but it seemed like they thought that since the overall power displays in modern cinema were so much more impressive than wha the Force users did in the original and prequel trilogies, that they focused more on trying to "wow" the audiences visually instead of remembering that it was our connection to Luke, Han and even Vader, that hooked us. They completely missed the point that raising the power level of the Force users means nothing without making them good characters, like they actually did with Thanos and a lot of the MCU characters in addition to their power feats.

And do not get me started on Disney's faux progressiveness. Everyone gets all riled up on both sides about too much change or not enough and it's a fool's fight. Disney has one agenda: making money. The don't care about the original fanbases (obviously) and despite their attempts to satisfy the loudest voices, they don't care about progressive issues either. They care about squeezing as much out of any customer, male, female, non-binary, black, white, disabled, whatever, as they can and they will do whatever they think will cause that to occur. Kathleen Kennedy might care, but she's going to be out on her ass, not because she pushed her agenda, but because the movies didn't make enough bank. If she replaced Mark Hammill with Denzel Washington or Billy Dee Williams with Billy Bob Thornton, if the last two movies cracked $2 billion, she'd be in charge forever, no matter what backlash from which side.

[Ares]

I don't think Disney in general had any agenda, but it was clear that some of the people they hired like Kathleen and Rian did.

Trying to make Star Wars more "progressive" just never made any sense to me to begin with. The original series has the heroes be two white guys, one white girl, two robots and a walking bear. In the second movie we get a black man added to the cast. Heck, in the third movie the black guy gets to be the one to blow up the second Death Star. The third film also showcased several non-white human Rebel pilots, and the overall leader of the Rebellion was a woman herself. Star Wars had always been fairly progressive. Combine that with Rogue One's diverse cast and the Mandalorian's hispanic lead (whose most reliable ally is Gina "my thighs can crush watermellons" Carino), and it's clear that Star War fans as a whole never really had a problem with women or non-white folks being involved with Star Wars. Which is why it's astounding that that's the defense they frequently went to.

So I agree, Disney doesn't really care about any agenda, but a lot of people working for them did, and the people defending Disney Star Wars (both on and off Disney's payroll) used politics as a shield from criticism, and called the fans something they weren't. Disney may not have cared about Kennedy or Jonhsen's politics, but given how badly said politics damaged the franchise, they're making the smart move by limiting their involvement and doing damage control.

[Ares]

Between BB8 being a rolling ball and R2 having those treads, I wonder which droid is actually less practical in moving around.

[Jabroniville]

FINN (FN-2187)
Role: Former Mook, Defecting Bad Guy, The Survivor
Group Affiliations: The First Order, The Resistance
PL 7 (86)
STRENGTH 2 STAMINA 3 AGILITY 3
FIGHTING 6 DEXTERITY 5
INTELLIGENCE 1 AWARENESS 2 PRESENCE 2

Skills:
Athletics 5 (+7)
Deception 4 (+6)
Expertise (Space Military) 5 (+6)
Insight 4 (+6)
Intimidation 2 (+4)
Investigation 3 (+5)
Perception 4 (+6)
Persuasion 3 (+5)
Technology 2 (+3)
Vehicles 2 (+7)

Advantages:
Equipment 3 (Gear), Evasion, Ranged Attack 4

Equipment:
"Laser Blaster" Blast 5 (Extras: Multiattack) (15)

Offense:
Unarmed +6 (+2 Damage, DC 17)
Laser Blaster +9 (+5 Ranged Damage, DC 20)
Initiative +3

Defenses:
Dodge +10 (DC 20), Parry +6 (DC 16), Toughness +3, Fortitude +5, Will +6

Complications:
Responsibility ("REBEL Scum")- Finn initially had only a little loyalty to the Resistance, being into it mainly from his friendships with Rey and Poe. It took him a while to truly identify with the rebellion and see his former masters as true enemies of civilization.
Responsibility (Deserter)- Finn deserted the First Order- an organization that raised him to be a soldier.
Relationship (Rey, Poe)- Finn used Poe as his ticket out of the First Order, and the two have a good rapport and remain good friends. He was extremely devoted to Rey as well, especially early on.
Relationship (Rose Tico)- Um, she loves him, and they kinda looked at each other once in the third movie.

Total: Abilities: 48 / Skills: 34--17 / Advantages: 8 / Powers: 0 / Defenses: 13 (86)

-Finn ended up being one of my favorite characters in the new movies, and represents something people have always kinda thought about- the Stormtroopers are pretty interchangeable losers with no personalities, like good Mooks tend to be, but what if one of them WASN'T? Finn, also meant to give us a minority as a main character in one of the movies, is a Stormtrooper who was like "f*ck this" and bailed on the First Order, having been raised to be one of their troopers. He deserted them and defected to the Rebels, tried to play Action Hero (a role he was unsuited for at first), and ended up meeting Rey and drawing her into the conflict. He kind of teased being a main character, but tended to have a smaller role as the movies went on and got more Jedi-focused, as usual.

-He spent the second movie being dragged along by Rose after trying to leave the Resistance to go find Rey, and to just get away from the deadly conflict (believing it doomed to fail). Rose was mad because her sister had already given her life for it), then go all wide-eyed with a "HUH?" when Rose revealed her love for him, in a hilarious bit that kind of mimicked the audience. Along the way, he reaffirmed his devotion to the Resistance, proving this by surviving against Captain Phasma's attack and then trying to do a suicide run agianst an AT/AT. In the third movie, he was kind of just "one of the group", doing a few action scenes and meeting another group of Stormtrooper Defectors, including one that probably woulda been his love interest if Johnson hadn't invented another one for him.

-Though Finn is responsible for my favorite part in all three of the new Trilogy- Captain Phasma, his former commanding officer, has spent the whole time ripping on him, calling him trash, etc. Finally, as she's about to die in a Baysplosion, she taunts him- "You're SCUM." And Finn stands tall and proudly corrects her: "REBEL scum."

-Finn is a pretty basic fighter compared to the rest of the gang, but still good enough. He's survivable, which is key in a universe where everyone throws laser beams.

[Jabroniville]

haha, I shared this on Discord a week or so ago, but this is an EPIC entrance: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vtO9Wqs ... Wf&index=6


A Japanese women's wrestling match between the Crush Gals (former teen idols, now butch ass-kickers) and two former top-tier Monsters- Aja Kong & Dynamite Kansai. The latter team arrive dressed like they're gonna ruin the Ninja Turtles LIVES, sporting incredible ring-gear, and the Gals show up to their '80s hit while their trainees all do their hand symbols. Such classic wrestling.

[FuzzyBoots]

One of the issues I had with Finn's character arc is that it went right from humanizing storm troopers are brainwashed individuals under the armor who could be redeemed to Finn cheering as he guns them down. I guess one can argue that he knows just how many of them have embraced the First Order's philosophy, and are irredeemable racist assholes (somewhat similar scenario, Haley Starshine in "Familiarity Breeds Piercing Damage"), but it still came off as kind of callous, and ruining Finn's position as "not all Stormtroopers are bad people".

[M4C8]

Between BB8 being a rolling ball and R2 having those treads, I wonder which droid is actually less practical in moving around.

You'd think BB's smooth ball shape would loose traction in certain places, especially sand dunes.

[Arkrite]

I always feel bad when people crap on the actors in these movies, because... well, I for one have no idea if any of it is the actor's fault. Largely they are presented a script, given some guidance from a director, and if they deviate too much from what they're told they may never get another job.
And if the script and the director aren't very good?
For example the prequel movies had a number of actors I know who can be quite good, and they acted like wooden puppets.
Actually I think the Thunderbirds had more charisma at times...

With Rey I see very brief snippets of a fun interesting character. One, right after they shoot down the tie fighters in Force Awakens, where Finn and Rey are super excited and almost talking over each other. It was fun and humanizing.
The other when Luke is tickling her hand with the plant and she gets to be excited for a change.
Most of the time she's either grumpy or just... neutral.

As a character she's a nightmare.
She has no real goals or motivations that make sense from her perspective. her only goal is to go back to Jakku(?) and rot away waiting for her parents.
After that she... uh... she wants to meet Luke to learn the force? Then she's all about the Rebels but short of her strange instant connection to Han and Leia there doesn't seem to be any reason for it.

She doesn't have any flaws, which can be overlooked in charismatic and fun characters but... well, she's rarely allowed to be anything like that in the series.

And then the fact that not only does she not need training, but she's incredibly powerful right out of the gate. Considering the whole series up to this point has been referencing Masters and Apprentices. Training is heavily implied, and we see Luke needing a lot of time before he can pull off even half the stuff Obiwan did.
This seems out of place and really ruins any payoff for Rey learning to control her powers. There's nowhere to go, she's already more powerful than possibly even Yoda. (Yoda struggles with one large rock, Rey lifts entire field of boulders?)

It would have been a nice for the big twist to simply be that she's a Jedi apprentice who's master made her forget about everything while they ran to lead away hunters. The trick didn't work quite right and Rey has some strange memories about missing family and a crushing desire to find them again.

It's also weird how everybody likes her. Han Solo wants her to work for him right out of the gate, Leia ignores a life long friend (Chewie) to give some stranger (Rey) a hug after Han dies.
At least when Finn liked her it was because he thought she was cute ;~)

[FuzzyBoots]

And then the fact that not only does she not need training, but she's incredibly powerful right out of the gate. Considering the whole series up to this point has been referencing Masters and Apprentices. Training is heavily implied, and we see Luke needing a lot of time before he can pull off even half the stuff Obiwan did.
This seems out of place and really ruins any payoff for Rey learning to control her powers. There's nowhere to go, she's already more powerful than possibly even Yoda. (Yoda struggles with one large rock, Rey lifts entire field of boulders?)

It would have been a nice for the big twist to simply be that she's a Jedi apprentice who's master made her forget about everything while they ran to lead away hunters. The trick didn't work quite right and Rey has some strange memories about missing family and a crushing desire to find them again.

It's also weird how everybody likes her. Han Solo wants her to work for him right out of the gate, Leia ignores a life long friend (Chewie) to give some stranger (Rey) a hug after Han dies.
At least when Finn liked her it was because he thought she was cute ;~)

Hmm... it would also be interesting if Rey simply had raw power, but not the finesse or control. Blast away a field of builders? Yup, can do that with all the subtlety of a massive explosion. Jedi Mind Trick? Easy if you scrawl smiley faces on their soul. Force Healing? Yup, back on your feet, sorry about the tumors.